Playing~Confessions of a broken heart"-Lindsay Lohan
I'm in this weird place. I'm too far to turn around, but I have no ideal where I'm going. While trying to remedy my situation I went through my list:
college diploma (check)
decent paying job (check...finally)
great friends (check...they may not be in my current city, but they're very present in my life)
money in the bank (check)
decent place to stay (check)
own method of transporation (check)
healthy (check)
social life (check)
spiritual life (check..not in the best shape, but still intact)
relationship (no check here, but that's not it)
Something is missing and I don't know what it is. I'm not hurting for anything, but I have this weary feeling. I was having the worst case of ennui. Everyone was so concern, because I'm the upbeat person who gets everyone else going and my pensive disposition is happening too often. I didn't know how to vocalize it at the time, but it was just an overwhelming sense of dissatisfaction. I don't know exactly how to overcome it, but I have to overcome this feeling of discontentment. I haven't been standing by do nothing. I've been racking my brain trying to cure my aliment. I definitely need a new job. I'm just spinning my wheels at my current one. Even with the promotion and the money...it's just too repetitive and mindless. I was working on that today, which was no easy task. Also, I need to go back to school. I contacted one of my college mentors today to get advice on what I need to do. Those are some moves I'm made to remedy the situation. Hopefully, these things will bring about some satisfaction. Has anyone had the something is missing feeling? What did you do about it?
Playing~"If I was a bird"-Floetry
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6 comments:
I decided to stop looking for what was missing and who was missing and living my life...having fun...enjoying myself....
In the end, I found that the only person missing was me. I was absent from my own life.
Get out there and LIVE
Life, there were so many lessons learned from running into two ex’s back to back who were both moving on with their lives while I was still pinning over what was not going to happen. I am not saying you are doing that, I but I do it all the time. I am constantly reflecting on my life and on my past. Seeing them both, one male and one female, both from college days gone by, made me realize that I had to let go of the past and decide what I wanted in terms of a real relationship.
I have had that I'm so busy feeling, forever, and I don't know what it feels like to make a check as of yet! In time for me...
I don't even feel like my wheels are spinning anymore, more like they just stopped. I constantly have the something's missing feeling. But on the other hand, I realize that I have that feeling because I gave that feeling to myself. Now, how to get rid of it is another story.
I totally understand the feeling. That feeling was one of the elements that led to my latest blog. What I have found for my own life is that there are no quick answers when that feeling hits. I lessen myself and become more receptive and prayerful. I generally don't allow too many people speaking into me during those periods for the sake of maintaining clarity. I'm beginning to look at such times as "growth periods" and the discomfort as "growing pains". Rest assured that it is unfolding...but only to you will it be revealed. Just listen..
man, Man, MAN! Can i relate to this one! This year i went from being self emploiyed to a salaried position. And those wheels of mine are spinning hard real hard right now. trying to spin right on to another position. I feel like I was rolling 100mph inmy life and now im stuck at a red light with engine idling. Its not a good feeling. Im working on escaping mine. I know i dont need a man/lover to get me out of this. I just need a sense of success that i lost when i won a salary. Hmmmm the grass definitely was not greener on the other side. Wonder if this Georgia drought has anything to do with it. Anyway, if you want different results you have to do different things. I'm making changes....Join Me!
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