Playing~"Smoke"-Mary J. Blige
This is week has been very interesting. I've ran into some situations that stirred up some type of emotion. I'm puzzled about my feelings regarding some recent events.
First, I received an e-mail from a girl who was the closest thing to my high school sweetheart. She is engaged! I was like aaahhmmm...interesting. Granted, we rarely talk and haven't spoken in months. we haven't "dated" in years, but I still felt something when I received that e-mail. Reality check! I'm not into girls that much these days. I couldn't give her what she wanted anyway. Good for her! I still felt/feel some kinda way about it.
Second, the inevitable event of me meeting my old cuddle buddy and his new boy. I knew what this was all about "let's see how he handles this" and "who's the baddest out of the two". They really could have missed me with all the shenanigans. I wasn't phased by the meeting at all. While I was whipping butt on the spades table(at least at that time) I look over and they are going at it. I mean, they start making out like crazy. I had a feeling coming over me, but I quickly brought things back into prospective. I didn't want him. Thus, I don't need to catch feelings now. He's not what I desire physically (he's moderately attractive), his conversation is okay, and his personality is okay. When we made out once it was whack. Thus, making him a mediocre person all together. It only gets more confusing when he says stuff to me about his love for me or baggers me about not giving him enough attention. I realize I feel something for him, but it's definitely not love. I wondered on the way home......"Should I date him?" "Am I being too picky? "Nobody's perfect, right?" He has a good job, he owns stuff, he is very social (which I need desperately) and a pretty decent guy all together. Our quasi relationship wasn't bad...I guess.
In both situations I think I realized the possibilities of what could be were dying. Thus, stirring up some type of emotion. I think the uncertainty of what I was feeling came from not really having anything to really feel for them. At this point, it has to be residue and the realization of things coming to a close. Idunno...has anyone had events that left you feeling an uncertain emotion?
Playing-"What love is"-Mary J. Blige
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5 comments:
I have expereinced that certain feeling when I've run into ex's, especially an ex that I never quite got over. But, I always tell myself that "us" not being together was the right decision and what is meant to be will be. Some how that helps and I pick up my emotions and move on.
I certainly don't think you'll feel love for folks you just dated for a short while, that said, men tend to be territorial and it's hard to see an ex with someone new for the first time; it's like someone stomping on your front lawn! LOL
Don't date folks for what you can get from them, date them because they stir something special in you...it'll keep you interested and make the dating worthwhile
Wow... When these kinds of meetings occur back to back, I firmly believe that there is a message intended. I have been in similar situations.
Dam case example of what ahppen to me last weekend. I went to my ex house to pic up something sunday and his dude answered the door. I caught the illest attitude. I dont even know why. lol I had to to go home an reflect but i was like wait i broke up with him for a reason lol.
Regarding ol girl, i still chill with my ex girl even though shes been married for a year now shes 27yrs old in 21. but we good together. I still feels some kinda way cuz if i was older i woulda wifed her up but shit.. i realized i like dudes more lol
Good luck....
"Don't worry about the people from your past. There's a reason why they didn't make it to your FUTURE!"
~Damnit!
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