What about your friends?

While I'm sitting in the window listening to the US Marshalls question my friend I'm truly amazed at what people can do when you let them into your world. I knew something was up with this dude after the second time we hung out. However, he was my friend's really good friend, so I decided to override my hesitation. I decided to just keep my guards up. Everything is cool. Everywhere we go people know him (he had a pretty good porn career(?)). He's crazy, keeps you laughing and is free hearted. Time goes on and my friend makes a comment about the guy and I let all of my opinions flow. Long story short this negro is a stunt queen! He has warrants everywhere. To varying degree all of us have been affected by his craziness. You have to be so careful about who you allow in your world. Thankfully I kept him at a distance, so I didn't get effect directly. If so, I would have tore that @** out of the frame (we almost came to blows at Sizzle). The good thing about me and my crew we always get the last laugh. Pose for the camera *click* *click* .

Conversations

I had a conversation with a group of friends and the topic came up of me telling my mother about my sexual preference. One associate thought it was the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard.

Buddy:"You're not gay!"
{Everyone looked at him like WHAT?! We have been talking about men and dating for the past 5-10 mins.}
Buddy:"You're curious. Have you dated a man?
Me: "no"
Buddy: "Have you had sex with a man?"
Me: aahhmm...define sex..lol.
Buddy:"If you have to ask questions like that you haven't. Why tell your mother and confuse her. You will have her mind all over the place for nothing. Wait!"

What are your thoughts on this conversation?

My deuce is moving to Atlanta. I'm so excited! We have been spending a lot of time on the phone and in person. He has been trying to help me navigate through Slick and I predicament (you know him and Plan B had something going on).
Slick: "I've been keeping something from Life"
Deuce: "If I was you, I wouldn't tell me, because I'm Life's friend and I'm going to tell him"
Slick: "You're very serious about your loyalty"
Deuce: Very. I enjoy you, but Life is my friend.
{Slick immediately withdrew his confession}
Later...
Deuce advises me not to get rid of Slick. Yes, he definitely was trifling in this predicament and he will never be around my man. However, I think he's just inexperience and that caused his actions to be whatever they were.
Thoughts?

What?!

Has the penis hindered any of your relationships? I went out with some friends the other day and I became like a television host. Throwing out questions to get a consensus amongst the group. One of my questions were, what do you find to be the most challenging aspect in a relationship? A few people said communication. People not being honest about their intentions and not knowing how to communication their feeling. Then, out of nowhere someone said sex. I thought that was interesting, so I decided to probe more. Plan B goes into this rant about him being a top and how he keeps running into guys who he likes, but they are versatile. Everyone begins to sound off about this topic. Myself and another guy thought being versatile was fine, but everyone else was adamantly against it. To sum it all up, they thought it was confusion. The conversation revealed a lot about people thought process. I thought having the topic bottom/top complex caused a lot of problems with relationships roles. Tops are dominant (men) and the bottoms are submissive (women)...foolishness. You are both men! I have a preference, but I also believe all d*cks are created equal and they have a right to be used. Granted, that statement my come across a little hypocritical because I never let anyone use theirs on me, but I do believe in compromise, so it all works out.

Plan B gets down right ignorant during some parts of the conversation. He is trying to model his homosexual relationship after a heterosexual relationship. I yell out PROBLEM! This is not a heterosexual relationship and it doesn't work for them either, so why use a defective model. Then, he goes and insults dudes he has been talking to. "I don't know why they would want to be on top of anybody anyway. Their d*cks ain't that big. All they are good for is getting f*cked." At this point, I was like is this mfer for real. I couldn't believe he would dog these guys like that and it revealed a lot about his character to me. I was so blown that I pulled back from the conversation all together. Just to note, if I wanted to f*ck, I could have per his words, but lately he has been on this alpha male sh*t. I can't even handle it. I'm definitely distancing myself for him in 2008. The hindrance in this a lot of my associate are my associates through him, but I'll find away to navigate through that. Anyway, give me you feedback on the relationship question and this whole top/bottom.

More like 2 degrees of seperation

I guess it's true. We all are connected. My Cuddle Buddy(CB) started pushing the envelope like 3-weeks ago. I began to avoid his whether direct comments, becuase I didn't want to be rude or hurt his feelings. However, I was still seen as nasty when I brushed comments off. Maybe, I may have made their efforts come across as juvenile. I guess my CB decided to move on, which is fine. It ws become a bit of a yawn fest anyway. We talked today and he released what he thought would be an atomic bomb. I've beening seeing this other guy, I really like him, blah, blah. I'm like "good for you". How did you meet, blah, blah. He brags on the guy. He wanted me to be jealous, but I was like "no really this is a good thing". Then, he gives details on his new "friend". I'm like OMG...I think I know the "love of your life" (me and my darn sacrasm). Well, what do you know it's him (the one who tried to hide that he was gay). It's cute, because I'm all but sure dude was checking for me a few months ago. CB calls, he gets on the phone, he's laughing, and I'm thinking no big deal. I later text him to tease him. He acts like he still doesn't like boys. I'm blown...get the f*** out of here.

So, I'm being hit on at work. Maybe, I should call it sexual harassment. This boy is saying in a little girly voice "could you do this for me daddy?" Grabbing me "don't leave me [insert some warm and fuzzy name]. I'm like YUCK! Get away...your not attractive and your antics make you even more unattractive. What should I do?

I don't know if I agree

I hope everyone had a merry Christmas.

A situation arose between a friend of mine and his ex. I didn't particularly agree with his thought process, so I'm getting feedback. It was a terrible breakup, so he felt like everyone who was attached to him shouldn't deal with the ex at all. Granted, they did do a lot of crazy stuff to him, but my thought process is they did it to you not to me. Anyway, he finds out one of his best friends have been keeping contacting with the ex. They agreed he wouldn't continue to talk to the ex, but he kept talking to him anyway. Anyway, my friends finds out that his friend has been telling his ex everything. He goes off. The ex shows up to the club they're at and that caused quite the scene. He refuses to talk to the friend and the ex. What are your thoughts? I thought the whole thing was a bit childish. I also thought you cannot tell your friends whom they can talk to. Anyway, your thoughts

You're my friend

I had a verbal confrontation with a friend of mine. It was noting detrimental, but we definitely had some candid words for each other. I think we all have a friend who can be a little off the chain from time to time. He was telling me something and I said “you have lies”. In laymen terms it meant you are doing way too much. We say that from time to time, but this time I guess there was a little too much seriousness to my voice and boy did he lay into me. “Just because you are too afraid to live your life, don’t come for me because I’m living mine.” I’m shocked that my friend just came at me like that. He goes on to say “you try to keep up this good boy imagine, but its unreal. At the age of 24 (he’s older than me) you haven’t even lived your life. You have no story to tell. You’ve never had sex; you never had a real relationship with anyone. I don’t know why we talk to you like you have life answers.” At this point, I’m over my shock and fully loaded with a counter attack, because some of those words stung. “First, you called me so don’t come at me with all of this drama. Second, I may not have done a lot, but that’s how I avoid a lot of the crap you go through and if that’s what you call living you can keep that. I don’t want a boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time. I refuse to be some else’s casual sex partner while they go back to the person they’re in a relationship with. Obviously, we have two different ideals of what living life is all about. You called me out of all of the other friends you have, because I’m the only one who can call you on your crap and give you some sound advice. Plus, I’m the only one who is mature enough to take what you just dished out and love you the same. He jokes “oh shut up, you still haven’t had sex yet.” I laugh a little.

After the laughter there was an apology from him and mine followed. However, it was made clear, both of us meant what we said, but didn’t mean for it to be as vicious as it was. I absolutely hate for people to be all bold about their actions or words and then try to down play them after they perform the act or say the words. He still feels like I don’t live, because I’m too afraid of consequences and too prideful to live with a mistake. I still feel like he needs to slow down and that he is definitely performing all of these risky behaviors, because he refuses to deal with some internal issue. We both kinda agreed with the feedback regarding us, but we realize we have to do things our way and our time

Easy Conversation

Playing~"resentment"-Jazmin S.

One thing I really enjoy about my friends is that we allow each other to be transparent without judgment. We share some of the most tacky, vulnerable, embarrassing, and happiest moments with each other. I think we don't judge each other because we realize that could have been me. I could have made that decision. This doesn't mean we agree on everything, but we respectfully agree to disagree. My friends really don't inter mingle. Outside of rommie/myself/and nosey (he found my blog...he probably is reading now).

Anyway, this question came up when rommie and I were having a moment. What three songs describe your past, present, and life? I pondered a minute and this was my response:

Past: "Be Happy"-Mary J. Blige
This song is my past and sometimes my present song, because that is my desire. When I was younger I always had that feeling of when will I truly be happy. I'm not talking about a moment or a week, but being a happy person (feeling that oneness). The things I did to feel love, happy in my adolescence/early teens years I don't talk about to this day. However, currently I feel pretty darn happy and I'm very comfortable in my own skin.

Present:"Wide Open Spaces" Dixie Chicks
This song fits so well, because it talks about someone going out on their own and making good and bad choices. I feel like I'm definitely in that state. I've always been pretty independent and my own person (sometimes to a fault), but I'm currently choosing my life path. Setting the tone for my future and who I want to be.

Life: "The Rose"-Bette Midler
The words to this song describe my life pretty freakin' well. It's about a person who never experiences life in it's full because they're afraid of all of the consequence that could come with budding. I'm the right down the middle type of guy. I, more than like, always take the safe route in life. I'm very much of the persuasion "if I made the decision, I will pay the price". I don't play the woe is me game. I did it and I will pay the price for whatever I did. Because of that I make decisions with the consequences in mind for the most part. Thus, I rarely do anything that's out there, so I always get mediocre results.

What are your three songs and why did you choose them?

What about your friends?

Birds of a feather flock together, right? I don't know if I completely support that statement. If you are friends with someone, there are somethings you have in common, but it's a dangerous thing to make people guilty by association.

Does anyone have a friend(s) that is unstable as Florida's weather? You know not to bank on a lot things they say or plan, because they are just flat out unreliable. Lawd, I have two friends like that and both of them pulled a crappy move this weekend. I wasn't even mad, because I know them. You have that moment of "I'm going to kill them", but you get over it quick. Our conflict is obvious!

Then, I have the HNIC (Head Negro In Charge) friend. Great personality, natural leader, and for the most part has my back. On the contrary, he is double standard (proud about it), very persuasive (can come across manipulative from time to time), and dominate. I think I come off passive (nice/easy going), but that's because of my desire not to start any trouble. However, I'm not the one to flex on. I can also be dominate and very strong minded, which is our conflict.

I also have victim. I love this friend to death, because he is faithful. I can count on him most of the time and I believe he would never do anything with the intentions to hurt me. However, victim is just that a victim in too many situation and that aggravates me to death. I believe to a degree people have the lives they want. If your too lazy to go out and change your life...you deserve whatever you get.

Then, I have my faithful few (about 3-5 people). We don't talk much, but when we do we make up for the old and the new. They support me and believe in me. Sometimes they call just because they are having issues and they know I'm a good listener. Plus, I usually give some sound advice.

How are you and your friends?