Don't cha wish your....

Playing~”You should be mine”-Mariah

What’s good? My posts have become less frequent and it’s because of two things (I’m either too busy or I don’t have anything to talk about). Sidenote: I’m going to be better about my grammar on here. Sometimes I come back and read what I wrote and I have that “what in the hell” was I talking about moment. I’ll be missing words, misusing words, etc…

I’m in this situation and I’m trying to figure out where I stand. You know, I met someone (we will call him Plan B) here. Well, he recently revealed he has a “friend”. To be honest, I was kinda shocked. I wasn’t salty, but I was caught off guard. I’m trying to figure does this friend know about me. He has too. Every Friday that I’m off, Plan B and I are eating out with his friends. I’m getting wake up calls in the morning, I’m the lunch date, I’m getting the angry, but cute phone calls/text because I didn’t call him back…you get the point. We are just friends, but my friends finally got me to admit there is something extra going on. “Life, no man calls you and says you are on my mind. How is your day? I asked him “when will I meet your friend” (yeah, I was being messy…lol). I never did get an answer on that. Clearly, this friend of his has nothing on me. If he did, he would not be around me all the time. I’m glad I didn’t really like him. I would have been blown. However, he is growing on me. Now, I’m surprised if I don’t get a call or a text everyday, which rarely happens. He would be a nice little “friend”. What do you guys think about Plan B and this “friend” of his.

Playing “I’ll Be your player”-Trick Daddy

What's good?

Playing~"Like This"-Kelly Rowland

• Well, the job I told "f*%$ you, PAY ME! They came back with f*^%$ you, prove you deserve it. I wasn't happy about that!
• I found this great website it really helps you with a budget. I'm leaving within my means! However, I can't get a car...bboooo. I have too much debt, which was a shocker. I thought I was good in that area. Darn those student loans...aarrgghhh.
• Speaking of debt, I've been getting rid of mine. That website forced me to take action! You really should check it out.
• The position I was promoted to has way too much going on, but I feel good about overcoming all of them.
• I am really trying to recruit ppl for this upcoming John Legend concert....it's not going that good..lol. I don't think people are feeling the price....booo
• So, what do you guys think about Kelly Rowland? aahhmmm...she might bring it on this album and she is looking GREAT!
• I went out last night to hear some live music and I really enjoyed myself. PJ Morton did a surprise performance and tore the place down. Don't you love live music? It gets all in your chest.

sharing a moment

I'm having a little moment and I want to share it. It's a little vain, so bare with me. All is vanity, right? I'm really feeling my body tonight. I got out of the shower and as I was putting on lotion; (you know, moisturizing my situation) I admired myself. Right now, I'm in love with my 28 waist, my 5'8 height, my brown skin.. everything. Tomorrow, I'll be complaining about being thin and short, but right now...I'm feeling what India said "I know my creator didn't make no mistakes on me...my feet, my thighs, my lips, my eyes...I'm loving what I see". Okay, back to the previous post

Things on my mind

Playing ~ “On and On”-Erykah Badu

Hi, I’m life and I’m everything I dreamt I would be. I’m so happy to be here. I’ve been waiting for the day when I could smile and give the finger to everyone who ever hated on me. Unfortunately, this day has not come YET. You know, it’s the worst to have greatness embodied in you. It’s always there to remind you that you fell just short of your potential. It’s there to antagonize you when you’re just a mess. You are confused! Trying to figure out how to manifest the ideals, emotions, words, and actions that somehow has penetrated your heart, permeated your mind and attached itself to your soul. You have to settle for “things will happen in God’s timing”, which they will.

As of late, I’ve been feeling some kinda way (let’s say melancholy). Completely zoning out and just doing me. Not feeling like being on the phone and only old school music can relate to how I feel (after 7, babyface, etc). Every now and again, I have to remind myself (you’re 23 y/o…not 30). I’m one of those crazy people; you know the type. They try to plan their lives out fluidly, but with time constraints. For example, I will own a home by the age of 27. They don’t care how it happens, but they can’t move into the home the day after their 27th birthday. I’m just wondering when the things I dreamt of as a child will meet my present….exhales

I’m often told…”life, you don’t know how to just live”. It’s sad, but true. I try, but even in the midst of my trying I’m thinking “what if this happens”. I am definitely a person who lives in their superego and I can’t get control of it. I have moments of what the hell. For example, I attempted to meet a blogger. For me this was a big deal. For other people it is nothing. Okay, this post has turned out to be about two different things I had no intentions of writing about. Can anyone relate to what I’m talking about though? The aggravation of having greatness trapped inside and/or cautious living. Until I write again…

Playing~ “One is the magic number”- Jill Scott

Bette Midler

The words to this song are so powerful!

Some say love it is a river
that drowns the tender reed
Some say love it is a razer
that leaves your soul to blead

Some say love it is a hunger
an endless aching need
I say love it is a flower
and you it's only seed

It's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance
It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance
It's the one who won't be taken
who cannot seem to give
and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely
and the road has been too long
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed
that with the sun's love
in the spring
becomes the rose