- The tug of war is over. What took me so long to let Plan B go (it was a quasi relationship/friendship)? We owe each other nothing, but we definitely let the war go on way too long. I always knew he wasn't what I wanted, but he was available. Unfortunately, I couldn't hide my indifference very well, which pissed that diva off...sorry.
- I finally retrieved my key from Slick. I love Slick. We are two different breeds, but he is faithful. It's hard to find that in friends these days. I didn't like the ideal of him having a key in the first place. Why are you at my house when I'm not there? Now if things are moved or eaten, I did it. Also, it was time for him to face his reality. He couldn't hide out here any longer. I felt some of his wrath with some sharp undertones, but I can take that. I think there is a little grudge there, but he knows it not warranted, so he says nothing. I'm certain he thought it was symbolic of our friendship.
- I'm feeling good and spiritual today. I briefly communed with God. There is such purity there...inhale. I have a few moments to reflect.
- I'm going to get a chance to see Teedra Moses this weekend and a few local artist, which will end my vacation perfectly. I still want to go out and shake my thang on the dance floor...lol. Wow...I just finish talking about my spiritual moment...lol. I'm a mess!
- The school and work thing is still a very pressing issue on my mental! I'm definitely going to go back sometime in 2009, which means I need to get my finances together now!
- I went to a dinner/birthday party a few weeks ago and I met this lawyer. He definitely didn't look like one. Slick declares he's interested, but I'm not too sure. He kinda inspired this post. I saw some pictures of him. He cleans up VERY well. I contacted him via e-mail off us his business card. We'll see! Oh Lawd...did I really do that?!
- I realize I'm afraid of choosing the wrong person and suffering the consequences. Thus, I've been talking about wanting love, but fear held my heart. I'm working on releasing the fear. I'm getting too old and my emotions are yearning.
- I was going to have THE talk with my mother this weekend. I end up falling asleep....sigh. I'm trying to find a time when her and I will be together alone for a nice chunk of time. I just have a strong need to truthfully speak with her about my sexuality.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Random (Plan B, Slick, new dude?, etc)
Playing in the background~Jill Scott Live In Paris DVD "Crown Royal"
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5 comments:
In the few posts I've read about you, I see maturity and comfort in your skin progressing. I'm glad you are purging things that aren't working and solidifying those things that do. Just know that time is all you need right now so don't rush anything.
Stay true to your soul and all things will work out.
Its good to see a series of more personal insights into your life. I am going to download some Teedra Moses songs.
Why do we stay in bad relationships so long? Don't feel alone, we've all hung on longer than we should have at one time or another.
Good luck with your mom. I was fortunate, mines brought the conversation to me and I just didn't lie. She ended the conversation saying she always knew. Ain't that a blip.
Let me know how the Teedra Moses concert turns out...Im still waiting for album to come out...
Dam I feel you on being afraid ito pick the wrong person and those consequences boy are a motherfucka...so ill just wait my turn hopefully ill get what I keep praying to god for lol....I think if I didnt confuse love so much with lust i would be fine but wateva lol
Oooooooo Dammmm good luck with telln your MOM....You a brave dude man...I couldnt do it...
I hope the email was a good move with the Lawyer. Everything has consequences but they don't kill you. Keep your head up.
What is that feeling about wanting to tell your mother? I've never had it.
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